Marriage & parenting
Can people see right through you?
You can't go deep if you never get past the shell.
Do you want to connect with people you love? Any longing to have a meaningful conversation with that teenager? Do you yearn to be understood at a fundamental level by your spouse? So many times I stopped short not understanding why.
Two things can greatly hinder meaningful relationships: self-preservation and self-promotion. If you aren't willing to stick your neck out and be v.u.l.n.e.r.a.b.l.e. with your spouse...your children...a dear, safe friend...well, you'll not go deep. I have learned to find value in TRANSPARENCY. Am I genuine? Are you? When the real you shows through, does someone say you've tripped over your halo? Ever get tired of striving to help others see you in a good light? Pride is a tremendous hindrance to transparency. Pride is not your friend. It has to go.
Genuine friends are trusted with deeper things. Genuine parents share their own struggles with their kids as they impart a better way. Transparent, real humans can offer and receive help, support, encouragement, advice--sharpening iron.
I can either have God's grace or my pride (James 4:6, 1 Peter 5:5). Learn to value God's grace. Choose to despise your pride. Be that safe person that others can trust with their vulnerability as you stick your own neck out trusting God to preserve you. Self-promotion is clearly rooted in pride. If you follow the vines of self-preservation, you may be surprised to end up at the same root. If you struggle to maintain your image or your shell, you'll end up finding out that the only one you were fooling is yourself.
Believe God will care for you, be real, be genuine. Transparency: I used to fear others could see right through me...now I hope they can. |